Parasites

This is a photograph of me back when I was an ultra focused missionary. Look at how young and handsome I used to be. What happened? I suppose the years are taking their toll.

This has been a great Sunday so far. Testimony meeting was wonderful and Chelsea's class was fun. I wanted to go to Pottawattamie's class too. Darn that Council Bluffs. Like Alan says, he really is the cause and solution to all of our problems. He should know better than to have them both teach the same week. It looks like a parasite has settled in my blog's comment box. Feel free to leave him comments too. Just specify who the comment is for. If someone leaves the comment, "YOU SUCK! DIE!", we would like to know to whom it is directed. I like that his blogs have an easy to follow format. If you could care less about his classes, you can just skip over it. If you're interested to see his thoughts on the opposite sex, it's easy to find. I might try a similar approach.

Stuff about things

I have some glow-in-the-dark footprints going up my bedroom wall. To enter my room when the door is closed, you have to do a secret handshake. I've never sucked the marrow out of a bone. I've never tried sushi.

Other stuff

Yesterday I had a lot of déjà vu . It usually happens when I get stressed out. I haven't felt too stressed though, and I don't have the heartburn that usually goes with it. It first started happening when I was in high school. I thought I had a tumor. I didn't though. Or maybe I did, and do, since I never checked it out. Frequent sensations of déjà vu are associated with schizophrenia and anxiety. Schizophrenia does run in my family, but every year past my 19th birthday, the lower my chances of developing it (If I don't have it already). F6 and Route 22 could easily be figments of my imagination. They're all so weird. Real people don't act like we do. Real people don't do the things we do.

Miscellaneous stuff

I hope this format helps everyone get through my blog more quickly. Feel free to skip any boring parts. Good day.

Super

There is no resemblance between the two of us. But. There will be. I love a challenge.

Rejected

I turned down a job. It rocked. I went in to the interview lookin' real sharp and all confident and such. I said all the right things in the interview and tried to portray myself as the model employee. Then he asked why I was interested in working at Sento. I said straight up that the tuition reimbursement is what made me consider them. Then he got all nervous and tiptoed around the whole tuition thing. He didn't know any details and I figured the tuition reimbursement wasn't what it seemed. I started to negotiate a higher pay, but he made it sound like he has no control over it and every one starts with the same pay. After he said that I could work there and was showing me the shifts I could work, I told him that I wasn't going to take the job. Then I walked out and drove home. HA! That shows you and your kind! WASTE OUR TIME WITH APPLICATIONS THAT ARE NEVER CONSIDERED AND EMPTY PROMISES OF PROMOTION AND HIGHER WAGES!!!!! Well now I'll waste YOUR time! I'll turn YOU down! I'll tell YOU that I may reconsider you in 60 days! REVENGE IS MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO!

Drowning out the roar of my industrial strength vacuum cleaner were the synchronized voices of 25 girls screaming "NO!" in a room across the hall. The women's self-defense class was meeting in the dance room. It was unsettling for a moment. No is somewhat a negative word and it was like they were screaming it at me. What was I doing wrong? The class ended and all the girls passed me as they walked down the hall. Nothing but smiles and laughter. I'm sure they all felt great. They got to scream and get some exercise. All the stress of school, work, relationships and whatever else girls worry about was gone. It was all expelled through their vocal chords. All the frustration and anxiety transformed into an echo off the mirrored walls. There were a few girls; however, that had a different attitude. As they passed, they stared me down as if to say, "I could kick your trash." I believe it. They're taking a class on how to injure men! I've never taken a class on how to injure WOMEN! I'm just not as well educated or trained as they are. Before you know it I would be on the ground begging them to just leave me alone. What if women let this power go to their heads? I can see it now.
"Excuse me ma'am can I see some ID?" asked the friendly guard.
"NO!" screamed the woman as she kicked him repeatedly in a place that is ridiculously cliche.

Women could take over the world. Our only defense would be instructors of Self-defense classes and scum bags that have experience in attacking women. Oh well, if they did take over the world I'm sure we would be kept around as servants, or at least pets.

Seriously. It's a good thing. I want the women I know to be safe. It scares me to see so many girls walking alone late at night. Especially with all the creepy guys I also see. Self-defense classes: a great investment.

On a side note, if someone were to attack ME, my most vulnerable moment is when I'm walking home from work. Every night between 11:40 and 11:45 I get hit in the face by the spray of a sprinkler right before crossing 300 East. After I cross the street I take off my glasses to dry them on my shirt. Right there. There is never anyone around. I'm tired. I'm not paying attention. And I'm blind. Perfect opportunity. Sorry, would be assailants. Now that I recognize this weakness I will take steps to correct it.

Guy's Night

Well, although Girl's nights may be fun, we opted for a Guy's night instead. It turned out to be a great success. We all left the experience a little older and a little wiser. Some important male bonding really strengthened all parties involved. Now it's time to get some shut eye. Stake Conference will be starting pretty dang early tomorrow. Here is our band with our new single, "Is She Just Being Friendly?" Alan about to kill Gavin in a game of Stair Master 2000
Council Bluffs and Alan elevating their thoughts.They just can't find anywhere to practice in private. They sure look comfortable though. Bravin the Gorlock!!!
Look out!! He's going to get you!!
Preparing for the game. Batters Up!Me, a little wet.That puddle is from water balloons. I swear. I haven't had that problem in weeks.That's my fault for choosing Dare, but it was better than answering THAT question.

Last Day of Summer

Here are the problems with the dollar a day goal.

1. It's no fun for me. Some days I just want to spend two dollars.
2. It's not fun for anyone else. What happens when my friends want to go eat out? Do I just sit there and order a water every time?
3. At the end of it all, the money I save isn't worth the trouble.

Needless to say, I quit that endeavor. I have done well with my study of Organic Chemistry however. I'm ready for school to start. I have to be excited and try my best to keep that excitement up. Otherwise, my whole head will be eaten and I'll find myself drowning my sorrows in a glass of non-alcoholic beverage. ---The job hunt goes well. I suppose. I've at least been able to send out a couple of resumes. Tomorrow I'll apply at Fed-ex. I get to apply to this one in person, but that worries me a bit. What if they want to hire me right then; right there? What do I say? Sorry, but I applied to some other places that are better and this is just a back up? Maybe I should go ahead and take the job just in case nothing else works out. I hate to go job hopping, but I feel like I wouldn't have any real choice. I need money and can't waste any time not working. --- There are a few things that have been weighing on my mind just as heavily as my financial issues, but I keep pushing them into the back of my head. This results in the occasional headache and sour mood.