Monday, March 17, 2008

Anyone want to get married?

I've been really entertained with wikihow lately. Yesterday I was checking it out and saw, "how to become an ordained minister online". I thought about it for a tenth of a second and then did it. Now I'm Reverend K. Robert Vaughn. Just bring your marriage license and I can marry you! I offered my services to some people last night, but no one is ready to tie the knot right now. I just married "Ms Jenny" and my ventriloquist dummy Mortimer. I think they'll be happy together. Any ideas on who or what I should marry next?

Thursday, March 13, 2008


Do we wish to be known as the one generation that never rose to a revolutionary battle cry? Shall we be doomed to never ending complacency? Will we allow everything we love to be stripped from us and desecrated in the streets of capitalism? Now is our chance to define ourselves and restore common sense and morals to this wayward world of Hillary Clintons and writer's strikes. 5 Buck Pizza is no longer the home of free toppings. It's the home of deceit! It's the home of fraud! It's the home of broken dreams! The American Dream! Shattered at the feet of bloated corporate America. We must make an example of 5 Buck Pizza. I'm calling for a boycott. I want everyone to call in or enter the lair of one of these hack shacks to order a pizza. Then as a protest you must cancel your order upon hearing the audacious price of 6.99! We won't stand for this oppression. Soon the taste of overpriced pizza will be replaced with the taste of Schadenfreude; the taste of the downfall of 5 Buck Pizza.
Please leave a comment in support of the boycott. Thank you.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

College Park

This may not be exactly what our new apartment looks like, but it's pretty close if you ask me. It's so nice to know where we're going to live, although it would have been fun to get married, come back to Provo, and live in our car for a semester. I'm a little nervous since this guy hasn't emailed me the instructions for taking over his contract. Right now all we have is a verbal agreement that isn't worth the verbs it's printed on.

I think I'm going to copy Becca who copied Kayla. I only have time to tell you how I know one person right now though.

Becca- The first time I remember speaking to Becca was at a ward prayer when I was introduced to her and about 20 people named "Katy". We didn't really get to talk much at that opportunity. The turning point in our getting-to-know-each otherness was at another ward prayer some time later when we twisted underneath the twizzler toe and talked about the Hudsucker Proxy. Our relationship didn't flourish then because I was dating Chelsea and soon she was dating Adam (Chelsea and Adam later dated each other. Life is funny that way.) After a few months I was single and began to admire Becca from afar, but didn't dare take action since she belonged to another. I would hang out with her and Adam, but I remember one specific time when Adam left the room and it was just us two. I didn't trust myself to be alone with her, so I had to excuse myself and return to my apartment. I did, however, have hopes for the summer. Relationships rarely last a summer break, so maybe...just maybe the fall semester could host the birth of our love. The last day of the semester, I was in the BYU bookstore buying a blue book for my history final exam (I got a B on the exam), when I saw Becca with a handsome young man. Oh no! How can I compete with him? Luckily he turned out to be her dad. She introduced me as Kyle Vaughn and said that I was a "really big deal." Wow! Me? a really big deal? We had a short little conversation in line where Greg, her dad, offered me a loan of 38 cents to buy my blue book. If only I had known that at that very moment in the basement of the BYU bookstore Becca and I were both...simultaneously.....single. Becca left for the summer and as far as I knew she and Adam were still dating. I went to Chicago and when I came back, Becca's facebook status had changed to SINGLE! She had posted a comment on facebook asking me how Chicago was, so I responded. I wanted clarification on her relationship status, but couldn't ask it in a facebook comment, and I was too chicken to send her an email, so I told her a bit about Chicago and said, "how's life." I know. I'm really smooth. Her response was, "life could be better, but DANG that bean is shiny". Yes, Rebecca Kay Anderson, life could be better and I want to be the one to make it better. May 14th she sent me a facebook message and I called her the next day while I was doing laundry in the Wash Hut. We spoke for a little bit. I called again the next week. I went to Texas and we spoke some more. Soon we were talking every other night, and that turned into every single night for the rest of the summer. When it was time for her to come back to Provo we were both nervous? What if we don't know how to talk to each other in person? What if we're doomed to only know happiness in a long distance phone relationship? What if we have different expectations of how our relationship should progress? Luckily there was nothing to worry about. There were some awkward times, but we moved past them and got to know each other better. We opened up, confessed our thoughts, and fell in love. I discovered later that I didn't ever want to live without her and asked her to be my wife. Now we're waiting for the time we can go to the temple and "seal" the deal. Get it? Seal? Seriously. We're going to share covenants. Baptism was just between me and God. Getting the priesthood was also just between me and God. The temple ordinances I've received were also between me and God. But this time it will be between us and God. We'll be making covenants with God and each other. I'm excited for it. Rebecca K. Vaughn. Becca & Kyle. rVk. "Schmec" and "I'm Kyle". I like the sound of it.