Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Ready, Set, Birth!

Well, Becca is over 39 weeks pregnant and we’re all anxious for this baby, most likely to be named Ruby, to bless our lives with crying and dirty diapers. I just diapered a stuffed animal in preparation for this life changing event. That’s all the preparation I really need, right? It has been a LONG nine months, but it will all be worth it if she ever decides to leave the comfort of the womb. I keep trying to tell her that, “the womb is where the heart is” but there’s no use reasoning with someone whose entire existence consisted of a single cell only nine months ago.

Becca and I know that having a baby is going to change a lot of things. Our priorities will need to be updated. Going out to eat at our favorite restaurants will most likely be replaced with paying a baby sitter so we can have a romantic evening at Taco Bell. All my coaching books will be put down so I can read “Mr. Garbanzo Sings the ABC’s and Learns a Valuable Lesson about Self Worth” to my daughter. Growing my career becomes less about buying a fancy car when ours bites the dust and more about paying for the exponential increase in car insurance rates when Ruby turns 16. My motivation for eating right and exercising will be more centered on staying healthy so I can be there for my children and grandchildren, rather than having the perfect beach bod. Maybe I can have the perfect beach bod too though. It just wouldn’t hurt anything is all I’m saying. Anyway, I am so excited to deal with the diapers and the crying and the worry and the challenges and the change. I’m going to be a dad. I’m going to have a daughter. It’s all worth it.

Saturday, September 04, 2010


This comic rocks my world. It's called "White Ninja Takes His Family to France". I love it.

Yesterday I went to a pizza buffet. It was the best pizza buffet I've ever been to, so of course, I ate way too much! I'm still feeling the effects. They also had pasta, so I tried some noodles with a spicy red pepper sauce. I don't usually say this, partly because I've never been a preteen girl, but OMG! I ate so much that Becca's maternity pants would have been a good idea.

This baby still hasn't come. I keep telling Becca to just start pushing, but so far it hasn't done anything. There's no excuse for her to not be born right now. Her lungs are even fully developed. She's just stubborn I guess. Well, we know that sometime in the next few weeks we'll meet her. It's really really really weird. I had a bigger vocabulary I could describe the weirdness. Maybe a quick trip to could help. It's indubitably preternatural. Yes. Good. I sound far more intelligent now.