Monday, April 27, 2009


Why am I blogging right now when I should be doing push ups? The answer is that push ups make my tired while blogging does not. I need to get over that. I'm going to do 40 push ups and then come back.

(40 push ups later)

That's better. I'll be going to bed pretty soon. I'm working from 6 to 5 for the next couple of weeks because a coworker is out of town. That means I'll be raking in some savory overtime pay. Today I was thinking about the techniques I use to get through a long work day.

1. Take a LATE lunch. I go in at 6 in the morning and don't take a break until 1 in the afternoon. Post lunch hours are always the worst! So minimizing the number of those hours is a good idea.

2. Keep a running tab of how much your bank account is increasing after every hour. The only time this hasn't worked for me was when I was working on commission and no one was buying. It was depressing to think, "There goes another hour, and I'm not a dime richer."

3. Don't look at the clock. Clocks were invented by Satan's Girl Scout leader. They don't just keep track of what the time is, they keep track of how slowly time is going. If you want to think about what time it is, you should grossly underestimate. That way, when you look at the clock you have a pleasant surprise.

4. Count stuff. This was a technique I used at Dillards. I counted all the ceiling tiles in my department. I would empty boxes of pins and then count them. I'd also get some wax paper and go over all the bars that hangers go on so that they don't squeak when you slide them. That doesn't really have anything to do with counting and therefore does not belong in this paragraph. I invite you to mentally move it to a more appropriate section of this post.

5. Listen to music. That's of course if your workplace allows it. Mine doesn't. Nazis.

Time for sleep.

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