Why I Would Be an Awful Film Critic

When I watch a movie, I want to see good likeable characters living out happy lives. I don't want the guy and girl to be mad at each other due to some misunderstanding. I don't want the superhero to lose his powers. I don't want anyone to die...ever. There can be conflict in the form of bad guys that have to be defeated, but the main character has to do the right thing every time and there can never be any question that he will succeed. The hero can be willing to sacrifice his life to save someone, but in the end everything has to turn out okay. Only happy endings.

So, my perfect movie would be the cheesiest, most boring, most shallow movie ever created. 

On a separate note, spell check is telling me "likeable" is spelled incorrectly. Is it really "likable" it just looks wrong for some reason.